Sometimes we get stuck. I definitely do.
After my last post about taking action, I started the What About Hope: Elevating & Empowering Women Meetup Group I’d been thinking about.
I jumped in with a few easy to do events — mostly virtual co-working so I could work on my podcast while others did what they needed or wanted to do.
One person showed up to the first event — a long-term client turned friend of mine. We caught up and got our work done, but what about the others?
Next, I created a trail run event because I planned to do it anyway. Why not have company?
Then, there were crickets.
That’s when I got stuck.
I stopped moving forward. It was as if my heart and mind were a bathtub with the stopper snugly guarding the drain.
Nothing came out — positive or negative. The figurative water started getting stagnant.
I felt bloated with the thoughts and worries swirling in me with nowhere to go, but I didn’t know how to change that. I was truly stuck.
I felt stuck because I feared no one would come to the things I offered that mattered to me.
My brain — feeling threatened — over complicated my ideas for events I could host, and I became even more stuck and overwhelmed.
I thought I might shift into action — in lieu of contemplation — when I listened to the leaping, aka experimental action, module in the latest round of the Playing Big Facilitator’s Training I’m taking.
But, no. The paralysis persisted.
It felt awful. The situation felt stickier and sadder and more impenetrable by the day.
So, what did help?
Connection.
I said out loud everything that had been circling inside me — allowing the accompanying tears out — in the presence of a loving person, and the bigness of it all deflated.
I’d already journaled about what I can and can’t control, but that wasn’t enough.
I needed to be in the presence of another person — who listened, who cared, and who didn’t try to solve it for me. This loving connection allowed me to shift how I relate to my work, my ideas, my dreams, and — by extension — myself and my life.
Once I said aloud what was going on beneath the surface issue, my stopper became unstuck, and energy, ideas, peace of mind flowed.
I was able to access possibility and wonder and awe and creativity again.
From this place, creating events isn’t stressful. Instead, I’m free to play and discover what works and what doesn’t. “It’s not so serious,” as I’ve written about before.
So, I offer this to you. When you feel stuck, find a caring person to talk to, someone who wants the best for you but doesn’t try to solve things for you.
It’s not surprising that connection helps to get us unstuck and back to what’s possible.
The power of loving connection is another reason why I love coaching.
When I coach another human, I get to witness their transformation as they move from being tightly wound to unfurling into their own power and possibility.
It’s sacred to be with someone as they find their way home.
Equally, when I’m being coached, I find my way back home to what’s true for me, to the best stuff of life. And, that gift is worth more than I can express.
In the end, we need each other.
Joanna Zaremba is a writer, podcaster, and wellness and mindset coach. She gives her clients the support and tools they need to feel good, so they can do what matters. She can be reached at www.joannazaremba.com.
This post was adapted from my Intentional Living column, which was originally published in the Pikes Peak Courier and The Bulletin newspapers.