A few weeks ago, I taught my first group yoga class in over two years.
I honestly thought I was finished teaching…
That now seems almost ridiculous, but that’s where I go sometimes—to extremes.
The last class I taught was during the pandemic over Zoom. Haha. Over Zoom. In fact this class caused me to literally be over Zoom.
I digress.
At the time, I found all of the technology of teaching live online, recording it, editing it, and sharing it to be unenjoyable.
I took it personally when issues came up, and tech issues were the norm. As I look back, it’s not surprising because it was all new, and it was all new during a stressful time.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t think straight or learn new tech—or anything for that matter—when I’m stressed.
We need to feel calm, grounded, and safe to learn. It doesn’t hurt to be interested either—that definitely helps.
Being anxious, worried, or white knuckling your way through learning isn’t an efficient path.
Those classes on Zoom felt uncertain, and I wanted to have a sense of control as I taught. But, control wasn’t possible.
I could prepare for my classes, and I did.
I picked themes and wrote out each yoga pose or exercise on a whiteboard that I placed beneath the TV screen that I connected my laptop to, so I could see what my participants saw. Above the TV sat my webcam and my phone precariously attached to the top of the screen via a GorillaPod.
Before each class, I cleaned my space, watered my palm plant (that’s now deceased), and I connected all of the tech, started the Zoom session, hit record and would teach.
I needed connection—like we all did. But, during each class, I felt more disconnected from my students and myself.
Instead of moving through my anticipatory nerves and getting into a rhythm like I would during an in-person class, I continued to feel on edge as I taught. Instead of leaving each class feeling grounded and more comfortable as the weeks went on, I began to dread teaching.
So, I set teaching aside even though I’d been teaching for almost 18 years at that point. I still worked with clients one-on-one, weaving in some yoga into personal training sessions. But, it wasn’t the same.
I got more into strength training during my yoga hiatus. I took more strength and pain science courses. I was all in with strength training and how it helps with everything from pain to bone density to aerobic training.
Even though I’m stronger than I have been in years, my body and my mind missed the grounded, slower, connected feeling yoga brings.
So, after doing way more thinking that was helpful, I decided to jump back into teaching yoga at a local park. The truth is, I wanted to do way more than teach yoga, but yoga felt like a doable first step into teaching groups again. (More on that later.)
On a recent Friday in June, I texted a bunch of people I know and invited them to my first class the next morning. By making it spontaneous, my inner critic didn’t have time to stop me from moving forward. It could be fun and free of all of the dread from the past.
In that first class, my husband and my son were my students—my husband participated while my son read. And, it was glorious.
The weather was amazing, the grass felt wonderful underfoot. Sure, we moved spots a few times to catch the shade and to find a more level spot, but that’s the joy of yoga in the park. By nature, it’s playful and laid back and fluid in the best way—elements I love to infuse into a yoga class.
Unlike with the Zoom class, I didn’t pre-plan the class. Instead, I listened to what my bodied needed and checked in with my husband. Then, I crafted a class that met our needs on the spot.
Afterward, I marveled at how everything I needed to restart teaching yoga was right there all of the time. At any moment, I could have asked my husband to do a yoga class with me. I didn’t realize how simple it could be.
He’s been an eager student unlike in my early days of teaching yoga. In fact, at my husband’s urging I taught class the next week instead of skipping a week.
And, I keep adding more classes. Because it feels so good. Yoga is a part of me that I set aside but that wants to return to be a regular part of my life.
Last week, a client and her family joined my family for class. We picked a different, more level spot this time…not the one I’d scoped out the week before—that one was occupied by ultimate frisbee this week—but in the spirit of yoga in the park, we rolled with it.
I left class feeling blessed, grateful, grounded and deeply connected to myself and those in class…like you feel after a delicious massage and a warm hug.
And now I want more. I want to keep teaching and see where it takes me after the weather shifts this fall. I want to help my students connect with their bodies and the wisdom that lies within them and see what unfolds. It feels sacred, like a gift.
Part of me wants to jump in and start offering retreats to share coaching tools alongside yoga. And, I know I will teach online again to reclaim that space with this new energy, playful energy.
But, I know my job right now is to soak up the pure joy that is teaching and to go with what life brings.
It’s summer after all—and each year is a new, unexpected adventure while my son is out of school. Mostly, I don’t want to control it too much…I want to dance with what is, savor it, and see what arises naturally.
So, my intention is to follow the flow and the fun and what delights me and let the next step—whatever it is—arrive whenever and however it decides to.
Warmly,
Joanna
Joanna Zaremba is a multi-passionate writer, podcaster, yoga teacher, life coach, gardener, mom and so much more. She gives her clients the tools they need to feel good, so they can do what matters. You can learn more about her and her work at www.joannazaremba.com.
To join in on the Yoga in the Park fun, check out my new online and in-person Meetup Group called What About Hope: Elevating & Empowering Women. If you’re not local, don’t worry, when the times, I will most definitely offer more classes, creative co-working, retreats, group coaching, and more on Zoom.